NOT THAT it has been easy balancing on the wire. The greatest danger of Internet porn in all its forms is addiction. There is a high that can linger and entice me back, despite my best moral admonitions and silent self-scolding that my insecurity has compelled me to hide behind a PC rather than go on an actual date. Back before the days when I didn't have a PC at home, I'd just spend a couple of hours in the nearest cybercafé, hiding behind the darkest cubicle. Now with my own machine at home, my cybersex hours can vary. Real-life concerns can limit it to the weekend or about one hour a night, tops.

But when I really want to hang out in that hot, hot land of cyberporn, I can stay online for a good four hours without breaking a sweat. Real-life schedules permitting, of course.

Yet there have been times when hot chats can get in the way of real-life work. A pre-scheduled one hour can stretch to four, pushing projects and deadlines aside, potentially incurring the ire of my boss next day as I throw caution to the wind. Truth to tell, there have been evenings when I've ignored text messages from colleagues and clients asking for my landline because I'm in virtual coitus with someone I communicate with through clicks of the mouse.

Right now, I can think I can manage it. I make a conscious decision to pull back — watch the movies, go malling, spend time with family and friends — once I begin to feel that relentless, intense desire to park in the chat rooms. It's not easy. But that inner alarm clock keeps me sane, safe - and gives me the justification to go back for more.

And when I think I'm becoming too cocky, I remember a very embarrassing incident that happened to a colleague. Three minutes into a departmental presentation on a new product he was making from his laptop, images flashed of two gay guys doing the deed to each other. You could literally feel the people in the room squirming, half in surprise, some parts indignation, and the rest in suppressed laughter. With one mind, all of us were asking silently: "Is he gay?" The idiot had probably surfed porn sites while making his presentation and somehow joined the links carelessly one sleepless night. Without as much as a bat of an eyelash, the most senior person in the room clicked on the next safe slide and turned to my poor friend.

"Mr. ______, nobody begrudges you your appetite or your fantasies but please keep them in your private sanctuary where they belong."

Amen to that.